If the world ended last week

If the world ended last week and all that I knew ceased to exist,
I would never again be able to soak myself in the beauty of snowfall
Everything I have done would be meaningless
I would never have the chance to enjoy the blissfulness of marriage
All the pain in the world would be in vain
and all the blessings experienced would amount to nought

But the world did not end, and I’m glad it didn’t, because it means that I can look forward to standing in an open square and allow snowflakes to flutter down all around me
because I may look forward to one day entering into the blessedness of marriage
because what I know to be true still holds true: that life is meaningful and everything we go through is part of an overarching plan.

Merry Christmas and have a blessed 2013.

The Passing Away of a One Year Old Girl

This evening, I received news that Jenny has passed away. Since my previous post, I had been sketching out plans to help her, and planned on visiting her once a month with provisions and to check in on her. Questions run across my mind when I heard of her demise—would things have been different if I visited her upon my arrival in Beijing? Why didn’t I respond to get my own tourist visa to come to China while my work visa was held up? Why did God let her go at such an age? It probably wouldn’t have taken much to save her. I’m guessing she died because of neglect. As far as I know, she never had a proper name.

I’m not sure what else to say.


After months of struggling and wandering, I finally got my first opportunity to settle down in China. While others around me see it as a bold step out into a new world, I see it as my homecoming, albeit it’s not to my eternal home. God has granted me not just a place in China, but a place in the country’s administrative capital—Beijing. Beijing is far more attractive to me than Shanghai, because of it has a much thicker cultural atmosphere and is not as business oriented as Shanghai, at least in Haidian District.

Six months ago I stood in front of Google Beijing’s office, and pondered about what went on in there. Yet two nights ago, in an unexpected series of events intricately orchestrated, I could stand in front of the building as an employee-to-be.

What does the future behold? How long will I be in Beijing for? I don’t know, but I know that the future will be good.